I don’t like it when the motivation for donors and volunteers is listed as altruism. I just don’t buy it.

Why would anyone do something that doesn’t benefit them in some way?

Giving away your precious resources of time, talent, and treasures should feed something you believe in and make you feel good for doing it. And feeling good is not altruism.

Giving away your resources in a way that does not align with one’s values, morals, and goals makes no sense.

Sometimes, we get so caught up in doing things others expect of us that we believe we’re doing something valuable. It’s not that we don’t, on occasion, have to do things we prefer not to, but why make a habit of it?

At the risk of sounding like Marie Kondo, ask yourself, “Does this bring me joy?” A sense of positive contribution? Is it aligned with how I want to serve? A cause that moves my life forward?

A few months ago, I wrote about being selfish, and boy, did people respond! The idea seemed so upsetting, especially to women. (recap: It’s okay not to make or buy brownies for the school bake sale.)

Ask yourself how you are spending your resources, and then ask why. If the answer is because it is an expectation, then the question becomes who expects it of you, and is that okay with you?

Take stock and, if necessary, realign your resources to match your true self. A happier life is listening to one’s heart and desires and ensuring they are on the priority list.

One’s motivation can be tricky to decipher since we are often programmed to please others. That is a frequent conversation I have with my hypnotherapy clients. “Where did the idea come from, and do I still feel aligned with it?”

If you question why you do what you do and wish to change it, consider using hypnotherapy to unlock your motivations and true passions.

It’s my passion to help you do that.

Mary