When I was a little girl, my mother worked in a nursing home as the head nurse on the third floor. She cared deeply for her patients and went the extra mile to ensure they felt seen and heard.

I remember her bringing me to work to visit the residents with few or no visitors on several occasions. I only had to say hello and answer the same questions repeatedly.

• How old are you? Five.
• What grade are you in? Kindergarten.
• And the other usual questions older people ask children.

I asked Mom why I had to go visit these people. They were old and smelly and wrinkly and all kinds of scary. My mother’s answer was powerful and has stuck with me throughout the past six decades.

“Never again will you have the power to make someone’s day, to gladden their soul, just by walking in the room and saying hello.” 

And it was true. I saw lonely elders smile, sit up, lean in. They were hungry for contact and grateful for someone to talk with.

This week, I visited my mom in her assisted living apartment. She lives on the East Coast, and I travel about once every three or four months to spend time with her. Mom was genuinely happy I was there. She claimed I was spoiling her and hugged me a lot. Asked me the same questions a dozen times each day.

She was grateful for someone to help her remember her husband’s name. “I can see him, and I know we loved each other, but I can’t remember his name.” John. “Ah, that was it. We were happy together, right?” Yes. Very.

The one thing mom got wrong all those years ago was the “never again” part. I made her happy by showing up and showing interest. It was so easy and so powerful. Different questions, same joy.

Your smile is powerful, and others are hungry for it. Smile. Say hello. Answer their simple questions as many times as necessary. Let people know, “I see you.” You will be so glad you did.

Embracing your power is so very simple. Maybe start with yourself in the mirror and move outward.

😊

Mary

P.S. Don’t worry lest you think she’s been abandoned. I am not an only child. My brothers also lavish attention on Mom.